I'm going to attempt to accelerate the process by taking on four candidates today.
And they've all been candidates, politically, at one time or another, as has Anthony Weiner:
President Bill Clinton, Governor Mark Sanford, governor Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Senator John Edwards.
1) Seriousness of the scandal--
Clinton--Really just infidelity, blown way out of proportion by the impeachment trial.
Sanford--Also just infidelity, blown out of proportion by the hike on the Appalachian Trail in Argentina.
Schwarzenegger--Just infidelity, complicated by nothing, except maybe a complicated divorce.
Edwards--Just infidelity, complicated by a wife who's dying, but whom a lot of people didn't like too much.
D's for all.
2) Degree of embarrassment they caused to themselves and others--
Clinton--Considerable, particularly to his family.
Sanford--Unknown, really.
Schwarzenegger--None to him, plenty to Maria and probably all the Kennedys, whom you'd think would be embarrassment-proof by now.
Edwards--Loads of embarrassment all around.
Clinton, B+, Sanford, C-, Schwarzenegger, B-, Edwards, A.
Those grades are based on Weiner's level of embarrassment being the highest.
3) Whether or not an actual crime was committed--
Clinton--Found guilty of perjury.
Sanford--No crime.
Schwarzenegger--No crime, unless you count "Jingle All The Way".
Edwards--The jury is literally out.
Clinton, D. Sanford, A. Schwarzenegger, A-, Edwards, C.
4) Whether or not the scandal caused him to resign from his job--
Clinton--No.
Sanford--No, although he was almost forced to.
Schwarzenegger--Was already a former Governor when the scandal hit. Now back to making moom pitchas.
Edwards--Was virtually unemployed at the time.
D's for all.
5) Nature of the creepiness of the sexual indiscretion--
Clinton--Paula Jones.
Sanford--Is it really creepy that it was apparently more than just sex?
Schwarzenegger--The potential menagerie of illegitimate children he has strewn upon the landscape.
Edwards--Rielle Hunter.
D's for all.
6) The extent to which lying was involved:
Clinton--Staggering.
Sanford--Considerable.
Schwarzenegger--Not really overt.
Edwards--Major.
Clinton, A+, Sanford, B+, Schwarzenegger, C-, Edwards, A.
7) The likelihood of his recovering from the effects of the scandal:
Clinton--It's already been total.
Sanford--None.
Schwarzenegger--Depends on how the next few movies do.
Edwards--Less than none
Weiner, too soon to tell.
So, no grades.
Overall Grades comparing them to Weiner:
Clinton, C-, Sanford, C-, Schwarzenegger C+, Edwards, B.
We can do better than these.
Next time, the two finalists.
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For those of you in the Tri-State Area, I'm doing a reading and signing of my book, "Mark Rothman's Essays" at the Westport Connecticut Library on
Monday, August 1st, at 7:30pm.
Also,on Tuesday, August 2nd, at the Huntington Book Revue,
Huntington Long Island, at 7pm.
I look forward to seeing anyone who wants to see me.
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