We're continuing with our list, leading down to the bottom ten worst
TV Theme Songs Ever.
Since the last time, a slew of more Worsts have entered my head, leaving
us with at least a semi-slew of more Dishonorables.
None of the semi-slew deserves to be placed in the previous opening five.
They are all worse than those.
But it has wreaked havoc with my numbering system.
So I will abandon my numbering system, and simply list the remaining
Dishonorables without numbers, going from least offensive to most, over the next
couple of sessions, until we reach the bottom ten.
There will be plenty of notice when we arrive there.
So we continue--------
"The NBC Mystery Movie".
This was the opening music and titles for three shows that NBC umbrella'd.
Did it save them money to do that?
What do you think?
The shows in question were "McCloud", "McMillan and Wife", and "Columbo"
You'd think "Columbo" at least deserved it's own theme song.
The one they used sounded like a whistle at a Naval fire drill.
A lot of people liked the theme for "The Sopranos"
To me, it sounded a lot like grunting.
I suppose it matched the visuals, the smokestacks around the Meadowlands.
But I only needed to hear it once before deciding to skip past it on the Tivo
whenever I watched it.
It should have been something by Louis Prima.
But then, everything should be something by Louis Prima.
The Second Season of "The Abbott and Costello Show"
It's not that it was so terrible, but it was so much worse than the first
season of "The Abbott and Costello Show"
The theme music and the show.
They only did two seasons.
The first one was terrific.
The second seemed like it was performed underwater.
"I Married Joan"
It's not that the song was bad.
It's just that it was performed solely by a combined male and female chorus.
In 1948, the Musicians Union, headed by a man named Petrillo, called a strike,
leaving show business to fend for itself without musicians.
Show Business tried to fight back by simply using human choruses.
The public wasn't having any, and Show Business quickly caved to the union.
By 1952, when "I Married Joan" cranked up, somebody there still hadn't received
A rousing "protest" song.
"Temporary layoffs, Good Times,
Easy Credit ripoffs, Good Times...."
The prosecution rests.
Another pure use of chorus, this time a male one, pretentiously extolling
the virtues of one Mr. Earp.
Back next time with more worse, and in some cases considerably worse, Dishonorables.
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- mark rothman
- Hi. I am, according to my Wikipedia entry,(which I did not create) a noted television writer, playwright, screenwriter, and occasional actor. You can Google me or go to the IMDB to get my credits, and you can come here to get my opinions on things, which I'll try to express eloquently. Hopefully I'll succeed. You can also e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org. Perhaps my biggest claim to fame is being responsible, for about six months in 1975, while Head Writer for the "Happy Days" TV series, for Americans saying to each other "Sit on it."