Jack Klugman and Tony Randall had this extremely strange relationship.
Away from the stage, or the set, I don't think they ever spent a moment's time together.
Jack never took Tony to the racetrack, and Tony never took Jack to the opera.
I don't think they ever went out to eat together, except maybe at the commissary.
But they were the closest of friends.
And it was as if they made a pact with each other to never disagree about anything in public.
They were always supportive of each other.
What went on behind closed doors, nobody knows.
But when people could see them, they were always in each other's corner.
An example Martin and Lewis and Abbott and Costello should have followed.
I've seen it written that Jack was such a good actor that people kept hiring him
after his throat cancer surgery, where his voice was but a croak.
Tony kept hiring him for his theater in New York.
I witnessed some of those shows.
Jack was barely audible.
Tony kept hiring him because he singlehandedly wanted to pump life in Jack's career,
and thus, his soul.
Jack engendered that kind of loyalty.
Garry Marshall did the same kind of thing for him.
Tony would not let anyone smoke on the Odd Couple set.
Except Jack, who smoked like a chimney.
But they made the concession that they would keep a respectful distance whenever Jack would light up.
This did not keep Tony from harping on Jack to quit entirely.
One time, there was a real shouting match after a rehearsal, and one of the producers said something untoward when Jack started picking on the writing.
Jack was apoplectic about being challenged.
Veins were practically popping out of Jack's forehead.
Tony spoke up. "Jack, please! Calm yourself! Have a cigarette!"
Both Jack and Tony were very nice to me, and most of the staff writers.
And to guest stars.
Particularly to the opera singers we booked.
Even to Howard Cosell.
But they weren't at all nice to supporting actors.
Tony couldn't stand whenever Al Molinaro got a laugh.
Because Al did it so effortlessly.
It helps when you have one of the funniest faces on earth.
We were virtually commanded to never write a scene where the supporting actors would
talk to each other.
They were always there to talk to either Jack or Tony or both.
I thought it made them a bit like props and furniture.
But that's just me.
There was an actor named Stanley Adams, who we wanted to hire to play a pool hustler
in one of our more classic episodes.
Tony threw up the red flag.
"Oh, God. He'll flounce around here all week doing his mincing homosexual bit!"
As far as I knew, there was nothing effeminate about Stanley Adams.
But Tony had apparently been exposed to this parade of Stanley's.
A compromise was reached when it was written into Stanley's contract that he would not, at any point during the week, do his mincing homosexual bit.
I would have loved to be a fly on the wall when business affairs was writing up this contract.
I'll conclude my thoughts about Jack next time.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Thursday, December 27, 2012
The Last Angry Man. 2.
I used to get a lot of flack from Jack Klugman about the way I dressed.
But then, I had an excuse: I was in my early twenties.
Jack was a fully grown adult.
And he was not exactly a fashion-plate.
He did not just step out of the pages of Gentleman's Quarterly.
Aside from being less than stylish, his clothes were usually ill-fitting.
I remember Jerry Belson walking onto the Odd Couple soundstage, taking one look at Jack, and asking "Hey Jack, who shortens your pants?"
These were the days when grown men got dressed up to go on dates.
Jack's idea of getting dressed up for one particular date was to wear the kind of hat
that my grandfather would wear for Yom Kippur services in shul.
I mentioned last time that Jack kind of grew into his anger.
He was indeed an angry man.
But perhaps "passionate" is a more appropriate word.
He cared.
He cared about everything.
He truly cared about doing as good a show as was possible.
He'd go to the mat about just about anything at the drop of a hat.
Usually the kind of hat that my grandfather would wear for Yom Kippur services in shul.
His main plaint in dissecting a script was "What do I want?!!"
I can't tell you how many times I've heard Jack say "What do I want?!!"
But this was a mark of an actor truly attempting to explore the depths of his character.
And I respected him for it.
What I really respected him for is that when we would get into one of those "What do
I want?!!" discussions, and he couldn't see what, in fact,he wanted, and we could, a
verbal tennis match would ensue, and every once in a while, it would suddenly end with Jack closing his script, and announcing "You're right!"
He was a big enough man, considering what a big star he was, to actually concede an
argument unconditionally.
I endured a lot of yelling from Jack, but I willingly accepted it, because it was all coming from his passion.
Then when he went on to do "Quincy, M.E.", I found it very difficult to watch.
His character was always yelling at somebody, and I had a lot of trouble trying to separate that from the way he used to yell at me.
It felt like he still was.
But he made enormous accomplishments with that show.
He was able to get important legislation passed.
As a result, "Quincy, M.E." was one of television's most important shows.
Jack, always a major horse player, owned a racehorse, a filly he named Jaclyn Klugman, that actually finished third in the Kentucky Derby.
You never saw a happier man than Jack after that.
For all that he accomplished, and speaking for all who knew him, Jaclyn Klugman should have won the Derby that year.
Yet even more about Jack next time.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
But then, I had an excuse: I was in my early twenties.
Jack was a fully grown adult.
And he was not exactly a fashion-plate.
He did not just step out of the pages of Gentleman's Quarterly.
Aside from being less than stylish, his clothes were usually ill-fitting.
I remember Jerry Belson walking onto the Odd Couple soundstage, taking one look at Jack, and asking "Hey Jack, who shortens your pants?"
These were the days when grown men got dressed up to go on dates.
Jack's idea of getting dressed up for one particular date was to wear the kind of hat
that my grandfather would wear for Yom Kippur services in shul.
I mentioned last time that Jack kind of grew into his anger.
He was indeed an angry man.
But perhaps "passionate" is a more appropriate word.
He cared.
He cared about everything.
He truly cared about doing as good a show as was possible.
He'd go to the mat about just about anything at the drop of a hat.
Usually the kind of hat that my grandfather would wear for Yom Kippur services in shul.
His main plaint in dissecting a script was "What do I want?!!"
I can't tell you how many times I've heard Jack say "What do I want?!!"
But this was a mark of an actor truly attempting to explore the depths of his character.
And I respected him for it.
What I really respected him for is that when we would get into one of those "What do
I want?!!" discussions, and he couldn't see what, in fact,he wanted, and we could, a
verbal tennis match would ensue, and every once in a while, it would suddenly end with Jack closing his script, and announcing "You're right!"
He was a big enough man, considering what a big star he was, to actually concede an
argument unconditionally.
I endured a lot of yelling from Jack, but I willingly accepted it, because it was all coming from his passion.
Then when he went on to do "Quincy, M.E.", I found it very difficult to watch.
His character was always yelling at somebody, and I had a lot of trouble trying to separate that from the way he used to yell at me.
It felt like he still was.
But he made enormous accomplishments with that show.
He was able to get important legislation passed.
As a result, "Quincy, M.E." was one of television's most important shows.
Jack, always a major horse player, owned a racehorse, a filly he named Jaclyn Klugman, that actually finished third in the Kentucky Derby.
You never saw a happier man than Jack after that.
For all that he accomplished, and speaking for all who knew him, Jaclyn Klugman should have won the Derby that year.
Yet even more about Jack next time.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
The Last Angry Man.
I'd been waiting for this one for quite a while.
Jack Klugman was ninety years old, certainly not nearly in the best of health.
I felt it was imminent.
I'd spent almost every workday between 1972 through 1975 in his presence.
I knew him pretty well.
So, if not me, who?
If not now, when?
I have mentioned Jack on this blog quite often over the years, and due to senility, I
may be repeating things I have said before.
But I know that I have things to say about him that I've never said.
So, if not me, who?
If not now, when?
Jack was the last surviving member of the cast of the great film "Twelve Angry Men"
In life, he was a pretty angry man.
In the movie, he was one of the least angry.
He was very young when he made the movie.
Maybe he just grew into it.
I loved Jack.
As a person.
He was very approachable.
You could talk with him on just about any subject, and he was quite articulate and
opinionated.
I loved Tony Randall as well.
I knew him for the same amount of time, but I never got any kind of sense that I really knew him.
He would always regale us with stories, but it was if he was an extension of his talk-show persona.
He was not quite flesh-and-blood.
Jack made only infrequent appearances on talk-shows, and usually hid his personality.
He never really opened up in those situations.
He was far more interesting than he let on.
Jack and Tony Randall were a great team together on "The Odd Couple"
Their strengths complimented each others, and they made up for each others weaknesses.
When my former partner and I wrote the spec script that got us hired, we had never seen an episode of the show.
Our only role models were Jack Lemmon and Walter Matthau from the movie.
So that's what we wrote.
When we landed on the set the first time, we got our education.
In our minds, Tony was far funnier than Jack Lemmon.
He was a writers dream.
He could make our words far funnier than we thought they could be said.
But in our heads, he was only competing with Jack Lemmon.
Jack Klugman was competing with Walter Matthau.
That's not a fair fight.
So we were a little disappointed
Tony was a great comedy technician.
Jack was a great dramatic actor.
Not a natural comedian.
My two pet peeves with Jack, which I eventually got over, was that he had a tendency
to swallow his punchlines.
And he'd laugh at his own jokes.
But what Jack had that Tony did not was major warmth.
Somebody on stage had to have that.
And Jack had it in spades.
He truly made you care.
And he had this other comedy asset.
He had this enormous head.
An oversized head.
When we put him in a fat suit, it looked like he belonged in it, because it matched
the size of his head.
When we wrapped his face in bandages in the "Theater Critic" episode, it was as funny as it was because it was Jack's oversized head inside the bandages.
If it was Tony's head, it wouldn't have been nearly as funny.
So I'd have to say, in total, that Tony and Jack were a better Felix and Oscar than
Lemmon and Matthau.
I've got considerably more to say about Jack, and will continue next time out.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Jack Klugman was ninety years old, certainly not nearly in the best of health.
I felt it was imminent.
I'd spent almost every workday between 1972 through 1975 in his presence.
I knew him pretty well.
So, if not me, who?
If not now, when?
I have mentioned Jack on this blog quite often over the years, and due to senility, I
may be repeating things I have said before.
But I know that I have things to say about him that I've never said.
So, if not me, who?
If not now, when?
Jack was the last surviving member of the cast of the great film "Twelve Angry Men"
In life, he was a pretty angry man.
In the movie, he was one of the least angry.
He was very young when he made the movie.
Maybe he just grew into it.
I loved Jack.
As a person.
He was very approachable.
You could talk with him on just about any subject, and he was quite articulate and
opinionated.
I loved Tony Randall as well.
I knew him for the same amount of time, but I never got any kind of sense that I really knew him.
He would always regale us with stories, but it was if he was an extension of his talk-show persona.
He was not quite flesh-and-blood.
Jack made only infrequent appearances on talk-shows, and usually hid his personality.
He never really opened up in those situations.
He was far more interesting than he let on.
Jack and Tony Randall were a great team together on "The Odd Couple"
Their strengths complimented each others, and they made up for each others weaknesses.
When my former partner and I wrote the spec script that got us hired, we had never seen an episode of the show.
Our only role models were Jack Lemmon and Walter Matthau from the movie.
So that's what we wrote.
When we landed on the set the first time, we got our education.
In our minds, Tony was far funnier than Jack Lemmon.
He was a writers dream.
He could make our words far funnier than we thought they could be said.
But in our heads, he was only competing with Jack Lemmon.
Jack Klugman was competing with Walter Matthau.
That's not a fair fight.
So we were a little disappointed
Tony was a great comedy technician.
Jack was a great dramatic actor.
Not a natural comedian.
My two pet peeves with Jack, which I eventually got over, was that he had a tendency
to swallow his punchlines.
And he'd laugh at his own jokes.
But what Jack had that Tony did not was major warmth.
Somebody on stage had to have that.
And Jack had it in spades.
He truly made you care.
And he had this other comedy asset.
He had this enormous head.
An oversized head.
When we put him in a fat suit, it looked like he belonged in it, because it matched
the size of his head.
When we wrapped his face in bandages in the "Theater Critic" episode, it was as funny as it was because it was Jack's oversized head inside the bandages.
If it was Tony's head, it wouldn't have been nearly as funny.
So I'd have to say, in total, that Tony and Jack were a better Felix and Oscar than
Lemmon and Matthau.
I've got considerably more to say about Jack, and will continue next time out.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Monday, December 24, 2012
Report Card---"A Christmas Story, The Musical"
What better time than Christmas Eve to do a Report Card on "A Christmas Story, The
Musical"?
Well, pretty much any time, considering that I'm going to pretty much trash it.
I saw it a week ago Sunday, in New York, with very high expectations.
Unlike the DVDs that Hollywood sends me, which is their idea of things that are award-worthy, when I go to see a theatrical event, I go on my dime, and only go to things I think I will enjoy.
I went to five of them last week, and they will all be reported on.
The main problem I had with "A Christmas Story, The Musical" was that I loved the movie that it was based on so much, and it was literally impossible to improve upon it, or even come close to equal it.
The movie is one of the greats.
Jean Shepherd, the long-time New York radio monologist, whose writings this was based on, was one of the greats.
He personally narrates the film in voice-overs.
He had a very distinctive style.
It was very intimate, laced with a thick Chicago accent.
In the musical, he again serves as the narrator, only on stage, with no traceable accent, sounding nothing like Jean Shepherd.
Admittedly, this is going to bother someone like me, who grew up in New York listening to him for an hour every weekday night.
It will not bother anyone who did not grow up listening to him.
But how hard would it have been to get someone who sounded like him?
It is one of the great stories.
In the movie, it is told from a childs point of view.
The cameras point upward to capture the adults.
In the musical, I was sitting in the balcony, looking down at the action, feeling not
at all like a child.
If I had one word at my disposal to describe the proceedings in the musical, it would be "Overblown"
They took a wonderfully intimate story and movie, and turned it into mostly musical-
comedy shlock.
On to the scoring:
Is it interesting?
The curiosity factor of how they were going to pull this off was always there.
B+
Compelling even?
Never.
F.
Is it controversial?
In only one respect, and perhaps only to me. Our hero, little Ralphie, had one wish
for Christmas: to get a Daisy Air Rifle B-B gun.
The performance I saw took place only two days after the Newtown shootings, and the show contained major production numbers glorifying shooting B-B guns and killing people with them.
Seemed a little insensitive. At least at the time.
This bothered nobody else that I could see.
C.
Is it a story worth telling?
It always was.
A+.
Is it good storytelling?
We've seen it told better.
C.
Is it well written?
The songs are rather pedestrian. Not as bad as "The Producers", but in that league.
They only dragged things out.
When they stuck to the lines from the movie, they were on solid ground.
And some occasional original dialogue was good as well.
B-.
Is it well cast? Well played?, Well staged?
The highlight for me in the movie was Darren McGavin as the curmudgeonly father.
The guy they got for the musical was pure musical comedy whose feet never touched the ground. It was well played and well staged enough otherwise.
B-.
Is it too long? Too short?
It's a short story stretched almost beyond belief.
C-.
Is it believable? Do you care about the characters?
The story is so strong that it is virtually damage-proof.
So you believe, and you care.
A.
Is it predictable? Does it surprise you?
They didn't change anything from the movie, so, predictable and unsurprising, as it should be.
No Grade.
Do you think about it after you've seen it?
I thought about how, with it all, they actually won me over.
A.
Is it funny?
The story is inherently funny. some of the things they added in the production numbers were also funny.
A.
Was it worth the eighty bucks it cost?
'Fraid not.
D.
Is it impressive ?
In that it was a major try, yes.
B.
Overall grade: C+.
It still made me cry at the end, just like the movie did.
But it could have done it without all the extravagance.
It's only fair to report that I seemed to be the only one who had any kind of negative reaction to it.
But then, I seemed to be the only one not accompanied by kids.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Musical"?
Well, pretty much any time, considering that I'm going to pretty much trash it.
I saw it a week ago Sunday, in New York, with very high expectations.
Unlike the DVDs that Hollywood sends me, which is their idea of things that are award-worthy, when I go to see a theatrical event, I go on my dime, and only go to things I think I will enjoy.
I went to five of them last week, and they will all be reported on.
The main problem I had with "A Christmas Story, The Musical" was that I loved the movie that it was based on so much, and it was literally impossible to improve upon it, or even come close to equal it.
The movie is one of the greats.
Jean Shepherd, the long-time New York radio monologist, whose writings this was based on, was one of the greats.
He personally narrates the film in voice-overs.
He had a very distinctive style.
It was very intimate, laced with a thick Chicago accent.
In the musical, he again serves as the narrator, only on stage, with no traceable accent, sounding nothing like Jean Shepherd.
Admittedly, this is going to bother someone like me, who grew up in New York listening to him for an hour every weekday night.
It will not bother anyone who did not grow up listening to him.
But how hard would it have been to get someone who sounded like him?
It is one of the great stories.
In the movie, it is told from a childs point of view.
The cameras point upward to capture the adults.
In the musical, I was sitting in the balcony, looking down at the action, feeling not
at all like a child.
If I had one word at my disposal to describe the proceedings in the musical, it would be "Overblown"
They took a wonderfully intimate story and movie, and turned it into mostly musical-
comedy shlock.
On to the scoring:
Is it interesting?
The curiosity factor of how they were going to pull this off was always there.
B+
Compelling even?
Never.
F.
Is it controversial?
In only one respect, and perhaps only to me. Our hero, little Ralphie, had one wish
for Christmas: to get a Daisy Air Rifle B-B gun.
The performance I saw took place only two days after the Newtown shootings, and the show contained major production numbers glorifying shooting B-B guns and killing people with them.
Seemed a little insensitive. At least at the time.
This bothered nobody else that I could see.
C.
Is it a story worth telling?
It always was.
A+.
Is it good storytelling?
We've seen it told better.
C.
Is it well written?
The songs are rather pedestrian. Not as bad as "The Producers", but in that league.
They only dragged things out.
When they stuck to the lines from the movie, they were on solid ground.
And some occasional original dialogue was good as well.
B-.
Is it well cast? Well played?, Well staged?
The highlight for me in the movie was Darren McGavin as the curmudgeonly father.
The guy they got for the musical was pure musical comedy whose feet never touched the ground. It was well played and well staged enough otherwise.
B-.
Is it too long? Too short?
It's a short story stretched almost beyond belief.
C-.
Is it believable? Do you care about the characters?
The story is so strong that it is virtually damage-proof.
So you believe, and you care.
A.
Is it predictable? Does it surprise you?
They didn't change anything from the movie, so, predictable and unsurprising, as it should be.
No Grade.
Do you think about it after you've seen it?
I thought about how, with it all, they actually won me over.
A.
Is it funny?
The story is inherently funny. some of the things they added in the production numbers were also funny.
A.
Was it worth the eighty bucks it cost?
'Fraid not.
D.
Is it impressive ?
In that it was a major try, yes.
B.
Overall grade: C+.
It still made me cry at the end, just like the movie did.
But it could have done it without all the extravagance.
It's only fair to report that I seemed to be the only one who had any kind of negative reaction to it.
But then, I seemed to be the only one not accompanied by kids.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Thursday, December 20, 2012
A Bluer Christmas Than Usual.
I had originally planned to write this article about two weeks ago.
Before the shootings in Connecticut.
I happen to be in Connecticut right now.
About fifteen minutes away from where the event occurred.
And what I'm going to write about certainly seems a lot more trivial in light of that event.
But it kind of loosely ties in, so I'm going to proceed with it anyway.
A few weeks ago, the radio stations began trotting out the usual standard upbeat
Christmas music, which I've always enjoyed.
The kind which now seems rather tasteless to listen to now, since the shootings.
But then, I was particularly glad to hear Bing Crosby singing "White Christmas", and
"It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas", and "The Little Drummer Boy"
I was glad, but I was also sad.
Because I've come to realize that the only time anyone is aware that Bing Crosby ever
existed is around Christmastime.
He has been pidgeonholed and marginalized.
Probably the greatest entertainer of the last century is now somebody who most people
under the age of thirty-five have never heard of.
This is, in its own way, tragic.
On the plane ride in from Detroit, I sat next to a very nice, conservatively dressed
young woman of about thirty.
She was erudite, literate, very well-spoken, and hadn't the slightest idea who Bing Crosby was.
She didn't even know from "White Christmas".
So imagine what all those young slobs out there don't know.
For the other uninformed, Bing was so great.
On so many levels.
He was an Oscar winner for his acting.
He invented a style of singing called "crooning", where he literally made love to the microphone, thereby making love to any female within hearing distance.
Before Bing, everybody sang at you.
Bing sang to you.
He had THE most pleasing voice I have ever heard.
He was a great jazz and scat-singer.
Artie Shaw, the great clarinetist and bandleader, who people stopped being aware of about fifteen years ago, referred to Bing as the worlds first hip white man.
Bing was funny.
He made a series of "Road" pictures where he was teamed with Bob Hope, who people are just starting to forget.
The two of them were hilarious together, and the films were innovative in that they all broke the fourth wall.
It's been said that Bing's popularity may have waned when rumors began that he beat his kids, contrary to his image of a light and breezy guy.
But the under forty crowd doesn't even know that he HAD kids to beat.
What are we talking about?
They don't even know that he existed!
If you happen to be one of those who have never heard of Bing, I command you to take advantage of YouTube.
He's there a-plenty.
Watch him do a live performance of the song "Dinah" with the Mills Brothers.
I know.
Who are the Mills Brothers?
Find out! This is getting tiresome.
Or watch him and Louis Armstrong sing "Now you has Jazz" from the movie "High Society"
If you don't know Louis Armstrong, heads will roll.
Go to YouTube and get a sense of history.
You will be better for it.
So, along with the dead in Newtown, I am also mourning Bing Crosby.
He died thirty-five years ago, but unfortunately, he is now completely dead.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Before the shootings in Connecticut.
I happen to be in Connecticut right now.
About fifteen minutes away from where the event occurred.
And what I'm going to write about certainly seems a lot more trivial in light of that event.
But it kind of loosely ties in, so I'm going to proceed with it anyway.
A few weeks ago, the radio stations began trotting out the usual standard upbeat
Christmas music, which I've always enjoyed.
The kind which now seems rather tasteless to listen to now, since the shootings.
But then, I was particularly glad to hear Bing Crosby singing "White Christmas", and
"It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas", and "The Little Drummer Boy"
I was glad, but I was also sad.
Because I've come to realize that the only time anyone is aware that Bing Crosby ever
existed is around Christmastime.
He has been pidgeonholed and marginalized.
Probably the greatest entertainer of the last century is now somebody who most people
under the age of thirty-five have never heard of.
This is, in its own way, tragic.
On the plane ride in from Detroit, I sat next to a very nice, conservatively dressed
young woman of about thirty.
She was erudite, literate, very well-spoken, and hadn't the slightest idea who Bing Crosby was.
She didn't even know from "White Christmas".
So imagine what all those young slobs out there don't know.
For the other uninformed, Bing was so great.
On so many levels.
He was an Oscar winner for his acting.
He invented a style of singing called "crooning", where he literally made love to the microphone, thereby making love to any female within hearing distance.
Before Bing, everybody sang at you.
Bing sang to you.
He had THE most pleasing voice I have ever heard.
He was a great jazz and scat-singer.
Artie Shaw, the great clarinetist and bandleader, who people stopped being aware of about fifteen years ago, referred to Bing as the worlds first hip white man.
Bing was funny.
He made a series of "Road" pictures where he was teamed with Bob Hope, who people are just starting to forget.
The two of them were hilarious together, and the films were innovative in that they all broke the fourth wall.
It's been said that Bing's popularity may have waned when rumors began that he beat his kids, contrary to his image of a light and breezy guy.
But the under forty crowd doesn't even know that he HAD kids to beat.
What are we talking about?
They don't even know that he existed!
If you happen to be one of those who have never heard of Bing, I command you to take advantage of YouTube.
He's there a-plenty.
Watch him do a live performance of the song "Dinah" with the Mills Brothers.
I know.
Who are the Mills Brothers?
Find out! This is getting tiresome.
Or watch him and Louis Armstrong sing "Now you has Jazz" from the movie "High Society"
If you don't know Louis Armstrong, heads will roll.
Go to YouTube and get a sense of history.
You will be better for it.
So, along with the dead in Newtown, I am also mourning Bing Crosby.
He died thirty-five years ago, but unfortunately, he is now completely dead.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Monday, December 17, 2012
Report Card----"Flight"
"Flight" is the one with Denzel Washington as the drunk pilot who lands a fully loaded
passenger plane fairly safely, and then gets called out on his drunkenness.
I'm not revealing anything here.
This was in all promos.
It's a pretty good story, rather well played-out.
It's the dark (pardon the pun) version of the Captain Sully Sullenberger story.
On to the scoring:
Is it interesting?
Much of the time.
B.
Compelling even?
Sometimes.
B+.
Is it controversial?
It is a very interesting moral issue.
A+.
Is it a story worth telling?
Absolutely.
A+.
Is it good storytelling?
It's a little ramshackle.
There is a subplot upon which far too much time is wasted.
B-.
Is it well written?
Well enough.
B.
Is it well cast? Well played?, Well shot?
Denzel is dandy. As is John Goodman. Nothing special about the rest of it on that score.
Is it too long? Too short?
The sub-plot makes it feel a little padded.
C.
Is it believable? Do you care about the characters?
Yes, and yes.
B+.
Is it predictable? Does it surprise you?
Not really predictable, and not unsurprising.
A.
Do you think about it after you've seen it?
Not really.
B-.
Is it funny?
John Goodman is funny. That's about it.
B+.
Would it have been worth the thirteen bucks it would have cost to see it in the movies?
Not here.
D.
Is it impressive ?
Somewhat.
B.
Overall grade: B.
It's not a movie that should be watched on an airplane.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
passenger plane fairly safely, and then gets called out on his drunkenness.
I'm not revealing anything here.
This was in all promos.
It's a pretty good story, rather well played-out.
It's the dark (pardon the pun) version of the Captain Sully Sullenberger story.
On to the scoring:
Is it interesting?
Much of the time.
B.
Compelling even?
Sometimes.
B+.
Is it controversial?
It is a very interesting moral issue.
A+.
Is it a story worth telling?
Absolutely.
A+.
Is it good storytelling?
It's a little ramshackle.
There is a subplot upon which far too much time is wasted.
B-.
Is it well written?
Well enough.
B.
Is it well cast? Well played?, Well shot?
Denzel is dandy. As is John Goodman. Nothing special about the rest of it on that score.
Is it too long? Too short?
The sub-plot makes it feel a little padded.
C.
Is it believable? Do you care about the characters?
Yes, and yes.
B+.
Is it predictable? Does it surprise you?
Not really predictable, and not unsurprising.
A.
Do you think about it after you've seen it?
Not really.
B-.
Is it funny?
John Goodman is funny. That's about it.
B+.
Would it have been worth the thirteen bucks it would have cost to see it in the movies?
Not here.
D.
Is it impressive ?
Somewhat.
B.
Overall grade: B.
It's not a movie that should be watched on an airplane.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Saturday, December 15, 2012
Report Card---"This Is 40"
"This Is 40" is the sequel to Judd Apatow's "Knocked Up"
I never saw "Knocked Up", but it really isn't necessary to have seen "Knocked Up" to
derive whatever there is to derive out of "This Is 40"
This is a movie that for me, starts out cold, and warms up nicely as you continue with it.
It begins as shrill.
It stays shrill for roughly the first 40 minutes. (Hence, the title?)
It's very difficult to like either Paul Rudd or Leslie Mann, the forty-ish couple
that the movie is about.
But once you warm up to them, which you do, the movie becomes significantly more
engaging.
It's basically about why people marry each other, and why they stay married, through
thickness and thinness.
On to the scoring:
Is it interesting?
It's never boring.
A.
Compelling even?
Not really.
C-.
Is it controversial?
There are issues dealt with that might be considered controversial, but not very.
B-.
Is it a story worth telling?
I suppose.
B.
Is it good storytelling?
The early shrillness is perhaps unnecessary.
B-.
Is it well written?
The dialogue is quite good.
A.
Is it well cast? Well played?, Well shot?
I told you what I thought of the two leads, but there are two wonderful supporting
turns by Albert Brooks and John Lithgow as the couple's fathers.
There is nothing significant one way or another about the way it's shot.
B.
Is it too long? Too short?
The length is quite suitable.
A.
Is it believable? Do you care about the characters?
Yes, and yes.
B+.
Is it predictable? Does it surprise you?
Not really predictable, and not unsurprising.
A.
Do you think about it after you've seen it?
Not a lot.
B-.
Is it funny?
Quite often.
A.
Would it have been worth the thirteen bucks it would have cost to see it in the movies?
Not to me.
D.
Is it impressive ?
Only in corralling Brooks and Lithgow.
B.
Overall grade: B.
I could have gone my entire life without seeing this film, but the highlights made me glad that I did.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
I never saw "Knocked Up", but it really isn't necessary to have seen "Knocked Up" to
derive whatever there is to derive out of "This Is 40"
This is a movie that for me, starts out cold, and warms up nicely as you continue with it.
It begins as shrill.
It stays shrill for roughly the first 40 minutes. (Hence, the title?)
It's very difficult to like either Paul Rudd or Leslie Mann, the forty-ish couple
that the movie is about.
But once you warm up to them, which you do, the movie becomes significantly more
engaging.
It's basically about why people marry each other, and why they stay married, through
thickness and thinness.
On to the scoring:
Is it interesting?
It's never boring.
A.
Compelling even?
Not really.
C-.
Is it controversial?
There are issues dealt with that might be considered controversial, but not very.
B-.
Is it a story worth telling?
I suppose.
B.
Is it good storytelling?
The early shrillness is perhaps unnecessary.
B-.
Is it well written?
The dialogue is quite good.
A.
Is it well cast? Well played?, Well shot?
I told you what I thought of the two leads, but there are two wonderful supporting
turns by Albert Brooks and John Lithgow as the couple's fathers.
There is nothing significant one way or another about the way it's shot.
B.
Is it too long? Too short?
The length is quite suitable.
A.
Is it believable? Do you care about the characters?
Yes, and yes.
B+.
Is it predictable? Does it surprise you?
Not really predictable, and not unsurprising.
A.
Do you think about it after you've seen it?
Not a lot.
B-.
Is it funny?
Quite often.
A.
Would it have been worth the thirteen bucks it would have cost to see it in the movies?
Not to me.
D.
Is it impressive ?
Only in corralling Brooks and Lithgow.
B.
Overall grade: B.
I could have gone my entire life without seeing this film, but the highlights made me glad that I did.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Why I Can't Stand Chris Matthews Anymore. Part Two.
First, the question "Why do I continue to watch Chris Matthews?"
For the same reason I watch everyone else on MSNBC.
I agree with his politics.
Now, why I can't stand Chris Mathews anymore:
1) He has always been a blowhard, a bully, and an unnecessary alarmist.
I don't know that anyone would have realized just how badly President Obama performed
in the first debate if Matthews hadn't kept shouting it from the rooftops.
And he is quaking in his boots about going over the fiscal cliff.
Democrats don't need to hear that from one of their own.
He takes on the persona of "Mr. District Attorney" with most of his guests.
I don't mind it when he goes after some smarmy Republican that way, but he goes after
EVERYONE that way.
2) He flogs his book mercilessly.
He wrote a book about JFK, and has plugged it incessantly.
I know.
You can say that Rothman plugs his books incessantly too.
That's true.
The usual blurb will appear at the end of this article, as with all the others.
But my regular readers know it's there, and can easily ignore it.
And I NEVER tell you how wonderful the books are.
Matthews spends five valuable minutes not only flogging the book, but telling you
immodestly how wonderful it is.
Lately, he has been adding "It's a great stocking stuffer" to the pitch.
3) He insists that the correct pronunciation of Dick Cheney's last name is "Cheeney"
Where he got this from, I'll never know.
He was never called Cheeney in any public appearance, either by others, or by himself. But Matthews insists that it is Cheeney, and corrects anyone who refers to him in the more traditional pronunciation.
Even Bill Maher called him out on it, telling him how sick and tired he is of Matthews doing this.
But all of this pales to what Matthews unwittingly and ignorantly did on this past Monday's broadcast.
Referring to the previous article, I explained about how rabid sports fans, such as myself, do not want to watch a sporting event when they already know the outcome.
Particularly cheap rabid sports fans, who are not willing to spring for the sixty-five bucks to watch a Pay-Per-View prizefight on television.
HBO is usually involved in the production of these Pay-Per-View events.
And what they do, without fail, is show that same fight a week later on regular HBO.
So in order to see the fight, a week later, on regular HBO, you kind of have to put blinders on.
You have to avoid local sportscasts immediately after the actual fight happens.
You have to avoid pages on the internet that would provide the result.
And you have to pretty much avoid watching HBO live until the replay the following
Saturday night.
You even have to Tivo the replay and skip all the way to the beginning of the fight,
because HBO is not above telling you the result just before they air the replay.
To accomplish all of this is tricky, and it's artful.
But it can be done.
It's not that hard.
I know many, many cheap rabid boxing fans who perform the same gavotte that I do.
Usually successfully.
Last Saturday night, there was one of those Pay-Per-View fights, involving Manny Pacquiao, a five division champion, and Juan Manuel Marquez.
This was a major, major fight.
I had gotten through the weekend without hearing the 'zults.
Then on Chris Matthews show on Monday, he told a story about how Mitt Romney attended the fight.
And then Matthews dropped the bomb.
He revealed the outcome of the fight.
I wanted to kill him.
Lawrence O'Donnell, on his show, later that night, told the same story.
Without revealing the outcome of the fight.
Lawrence O'Donnell was always a classier act.
Okay.
So maybe all of this seems trivial to you.
Maybe it would all seem trivial to Matthews if he had any sense of how many hearts were broken when he did that.
Maybe he'll have Google Alert, and read this, and feel sorry for what he did.
But most-likely he won't.
And that's why I can't stand Chris Matthews anymore.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
For the same reason I watch everyone else on MSNBC.
I agree with his politics.
Now, why I can't stand Chris Mathews anymore:
1) He has always been a blowhard, a bully, and an unnecessary alarmist.
I don't know that anyone would have realized just how badly President Obama performed
in the first debate if Matthews hadn't kept shouting it from the rooftops.
And he is quaking in his boots about going over the fiscal cliff.
Democrats don't need to hear that from one of their own.
He takes on the persona of "Mr. District Attorney" with most of his guests.
I don't mind it when he goes after some smarmy Republican that way, but he goes after
EVERYONE that way.
2) He flogs his book mercilessly.
He wrote a book about JFK, and has plugged it incessantly.
I know.
You can say that Rothman plugs his books incessantly too.
That's true.
The usual blurb will appear at the end of this article, as with all the others.
But my regular readers know it's there, and can easily ignore it.
And I NEVER tell you how wonderful the books are.
Matthews spends five valuable minutes not only flogging the book, but telling you
immodestly how wonderful it is.
Lately, he has been adding "It's a great stocking stuffer" to the pitch.
3) He insists that the correct pronunciation of Dick Cheney's last name is "Cheeney"
Where he got this from, I'll never know.
He was never called Cheeney in any public appearance, either by others, or by himself. But Matthews insists that it is Cheeney, and corrects anyone who refers to him in the more traditional pronunciation.
Even Bill Maher called him out on it, telling him how sick and tired he is of Matthews doing this.
But all of this pales to what Matthews unwittingly and ignorantly did on this past Monday's broadcast.
Referring to the previous article, I explained about how rabid sports fans, such as myself, do not want to watch a sporting event when they already know the outcome.
Particularly cheap rabid sports fans, who are not willing to spring for the sixty-five bucks to watch a Pay-Per-View prizefight on television.
HBO is usually involved in the production of these Pay-Per-View events.
And what they do, without fail, is show that same fight a week later on regular HBO.
So in order to see the fight, a week later, on regular HBO, you kind of have to put blinders on.
You have to avoid local sportscasts immediately after the actual fight happens.
You have to avoid pages on the internet that would provide the result.
And you have to pretty much avoid watching HBO live until the replay the following
Saturday night.
You even have to Tivo the replay and skip all the way to the beginning of the fight,
because HBO is not above telling you the result just before they air the replay.
To accomplish all of this is tricky, and it's artful.
But it can be done.
It's not that hard.
I know many, many cheap rabid boxing fans who perform the same gavotte that I do.
Usually successfully.
Last Saturday night, there was one of those Pay-Per-View fights, involving Manny Pacquiao, a five division champion, and Juan Manuel Marquez.
This was a major, major fight.
I had gotten through the weekend without hearing the 'zults.
Then on Chris Matthews show on Monday, he told a story about how Mitt Romney attended the fight.
And then Matthews dropped the bomb.
He revealed the outcome of the fight.
I wanted to kill him.
Lawrence O'Donnell, on his show, later that night, told the same story.
Without revealing the outcome of the fight.
Lawrence O'Donnell was always a classier act.
Okay.
So maybe all of this seems trivial to you.
Maybe it would all seem trivial to Matthews if he had any sense of how many hearts were broken when he did that.
Maybe he'll have Google Alert, and read this, and feel sorry for what he did.
But most-likely he won't.
And that's why I can't stand Chris Matthews anymore.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Why I Can't Stand Chris Matthews Anymore. Part One.
I'm not going to talk about Chris Matthews here.
That will wait for Part Two.
This will be about laying the groundwork for Part Two.
This is merely the prelude.
As many of you know by now, I am a rabid sports fan.
All rabid sports fans know that there is nothing more pointless than watching a sporting event where you already know the outcome.
Rabid sports fans will go to great lengths to avoid hearing the outcome of a sporting event that has already taken place.
When I lived primarily on the West Coast, they used to make it particularly difficult to to avoid learning the outcome of a sporting event that had already taken place, but hadn't aired on TV yet.
Because they would commonly show these events, particularly basketball games, later in the evening, on tape, to get bigger audiences for them.
Probably the biggest fight I had with my ex-wife was when she told me the score of a game that had already ended, but I was just starting to watch on TV.
And I had money on the game.
It was the biggest fight we had in our entire marriage.
Including the custody fight for our daughter.
In the early seventies, the Lakers were playing the Knicks in the NBA Finals.
My friends and I were Knick fans.
We were living in L,A.
The game wasn't sold out, so it was blacked out on local television.
But the local ABC station announced that they were going to air a replay of the game
at 11:30 that night.
What to do?
We made the decision to go to the movies, avoid listening to the game, coming back home and watching the game as if it were live.
Pretty good plan, huh?
I remember nothing about the movie.
I don't remember what movie we saw.
What I remember is that as soon as the movie ended, the manager of the theater came
out on to the apron of the stage and announced "I think you'll all be happy to know that the Lakers beat the Knicks tonight by thirty-five points."
A big whoop went up from the audience.
Except from us.
We weren't whooping.
We were appalled.
We were distraught.
Not only because the Knicks got walloped, but because we heard the outcome, and learned that there was no place safe left in the world.
We yelled out curses to the theater manager.
If anyone wanted to follow the game, why didn't they go to the game, or at least follow it on the radio?
The movies is supposed to be a place of refuge, although John Dillinger or Lee Harvey Oswald would certainly have given you an argument about that.
Next time, I'll discuss how Chris Matthews committed roughly the same breach of etiquette on his show yesterday, for which I'll never forgive him.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
That will wait for Part Two.
This will be about laying the groundwork for Part Two.
This is merely the prelude.
As many of you know by now, I am a rabid sports fan.
All rabid sports fans know that there is nothing more pointless than watching a sporting event where you already know the outcome.
Rabid sports fans will go to great lengths to avoid hearing the outcome of a sporting event that has already taken place.
When I lived primarily on the West Coast, they used to make it particularly difficult to to avoid learning the outcome of a sporting event that had already taken place, but hadn't aired on TV yet.
Because they would commonly show these events, particularly basketball games, later in the evening, on tape, to get bigger audiences for them.
Probably the biggest fight I had with my ex-wife was when she told me the score of a game that had already ended, but I was just starting to watch on TV.
And I had money on the game.
It was the biggest fight we had in our entire marriage.
Including the custody fight for our daughter.
In the early seventies, the Lakers were playing the Knicks in the NBA Finals.
My friends and I were Knick fans.
We were living in L,A.
The game wasn't sold out, so it was blacked out on local television.
But the local ABC station announced that they were going to air a replay of the game
at 11:30 that night.
What to do?
We made the decision to go to the movies, avoid listening to the game, coming back home and watching the game as if it were live.
Pretty good plan, huh?
I remember nothing about the movie.
I don't remember what movie we saw.
What I remember is that as soon as the movie ended, the manager of the theater came
out on to the apron of the stage and announced "I think you'll all be happy to know that the Lakers beat the Knicks tonight by thirty-five points."
A big whoop went up from the audience.
Except from us.
We weren't whooping.
We were appalled.
We were distraught.
Not only because the Knicks got walloped, but because we heard the outcome, and learned that there was no place safe left in the world.
We yelled out curses to the theater manager.
If anyone wanted to follow the game, why didn't they go to the game, or at least follow it on the radio?
The movies is supposed to be a place of refuge, although John Dillinger or Lee Harvey Oswald would certainly have given you an argument about that.
Next time, I'll discuss how Chris Matthews committed roughly the same breach of etiquette on his show yesterday, for which I'll never forgive him.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Saturday, December 8, 2012
Shakin' It Up. 3.
Okay.
It's going to be three and out.
But I'm only going to be talking about two.
Charo:
Probably the best representative of "Shakin' it up" that we've ever had.
And probably the least personally damaged by it.
She began her career by marrying Xavier Cugat.
As did Abbe Lane.
Yes, we're coming full circle.
Charo was one of those talk-show guests who made their bones by coming on and
fracturing the language.
This form of talk-show guest always worked best with Jack Paar.
He had his regulars in this regard.
Genevieve, Jack Douglas's Japanese wife Reiko......
Charo fit in to the pattern, although I don't think she was ever on with Paar.
Paar's attitude with these guests was what made it work.
He looked at all of them as if they had three heads.
When Paar went off the air, these language fracturers gravitated to appearing on
Merv Griffin's show, where they were completely wasted.
Because Merv looked at them as if they only had one head.
He enjoyed them.
And that killed it for me.
Johnny Carson would never book Charo as a guest.
She would be relegated to being booked whenever a guest host was there, as were
many other celebrities.
I remember one of my first exposures to David Letterman.
He was guest hosting for Carson.
Charo was booked to appear with Letterman on one of his guest-hosting nights.
She came on, and began being her usual incomprehensible self.
And Letterman looked at her as if she was from Mars.
And I shouted at the TV screen in my living room: "Jack Paar lives!"
For that alone, he deserved his Kennedy Center Honor.
Then, there is the question of Charo's age.
Birth certificates have turned up stating that she was born in 1941.
She has gone to court in an attempt to prove that she was born in 1951.
When I was eighteen, I was a page at ABC in New York.
I was working on one of their variety shows.
Cugat and Charo, newly married, were booked on this show.
I got a chance to get a look at Charo close up.
You know how when you're young, you have this automatic feel for who's older or younger than you?
There was no doubt in my mind that Charo was at least several years older than me.
Hell, if she was born in 1951, that would have meant that she was roughly thirteen
years old when she married Cugat.
I don't think so.
Anyway, she's still out there.
Still kootchy-kootchying.
I understand that fairly recently, the kootchy-kootchying was done in Branson, the
redneck armpit of show business.
Lola Falana:
We will conclude with her.
Lola Falana was the black Joey Heatherton.
I'd seen them both when they worked Las Vegas, and their acts were interchangeable.
One thing about women who shook it up for a living: There was never any ethnic
discrimination involved.
There was complete diversity.
Just in the ones I mentioned, you have blacks, whites, white trash, Jews, and Mexicans.
Yes, Abbe Lane was Jewish, not Latin.
Lola Falana was perhaps best known for being Sammy Davis Jr.'s "protege"
Lola was also pretty much responsible for breaking up Sammy's marriage to Mai Britt, according to some sources.
She is not to be confused with Altovese Gore, who was Sammy's next and last wife, who ended up indigent and dead at 65.
Probably shook it up at one point or another.
Lola was also well known for battling major health problems.
I think she had more than one bout with multiple sclerosis.
It's been a rocky road for her.
But that didn't stop her from also playing Branson, in the late 90s.
Mai Britt is alive, and healthy, and remarried, and great, and pushing eighty.
She never had to shake it up.
So what have we learned from all of this?
That "Shakin' it up" is a precarious profession at best.
And if you can graduate from it, you are better off.
There don't seem to be any up-and-coming "Shakin'-it-uppers"
It seems to have become a lost art.
And if you have participated in it, there is an excellent chance that you were
either married to Xavier Cugat, or worked Branson.
Or both.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
It's going to be three and out.
But I'm only going to be talking about two.
Charo:
Probably the best representative of "Shakin' it up" that we've ever had.
And probably the least personally damaged by it.
She began her career by marrying Xavier Cugat.
As did Abbe Lane.
Yes, we're coming full circle.
Charo was one of those talk-show guests who made their bones by coming on and
fracturing the language.
This form of talk-show guest always worked best with Jack Paar.
He had his regulars in this regard.
Genevieve, Jack Douglas's Japanese wife Reiko......
Charo fit in to the pattern, although I don't think she was ever on with Paar.
Paar's attitude with these guests was what made it work.
He looked at all of them as if they had three heads.
When Paar went off the air, these language fracturers gravitated to appearing on
Merv Griffin's show, where they were completely wasted.
Because Merv looked at them as if they only had one head.
He enjoyed them.
And that killed it for me.
Johnny Carson would never book Charo as a guest.
She would be relegated to being booked whenever a guest host was there, as were
many other celebrities.
I remember one of my first exposures to David Letterman.
He was guest hosting for Carson.
Charo was booked to appear with Letterman on one of his guest-hosting nights.
She came on, and began being her usual incomprehensible self.
And Letterman looked at her as if she was from Mars.
And I shouted at the TV screen in my living room: "Jack Paar lives!"
For that alone, he deserved his Kennedy Center Honor.
Then, there is the question of Charo's age.
Birth certificates have turned up stating that she was born in 1941.
She has gone to court in an attempt to prove that she was born in 1951.
When I was eighteen, I was a page at ABC in New York.
I was working on one of their variety shows.
Cugat and Charo, newly married, were booked on this show.
I got a chance to get a look at Charo close up.
You know how when you're young, you have this automatic feel for who's older or younger than you?
There was no doubt in my mind that Charo was at least several years older than me.
Hell, if she was born in 1951, that would have meant that she was roughly thirteen
years old when she married Cugat.
I don't think so.
Anyway, she's still out there.
Still kootchy-kootchying.
I understand that fairly recently, the kootchy-kootchying was done in Branson, the
redneck armpit of show business.
Lola Falana:
We will conclude with her.
Lola Falana was the black Joey Heatherton.
I'd seen them both when they worked Las Vegas, and their acts were interchangeable.
One thing about women who shook it up for a living: There was never any ethnic
discrimination involved.
There was complete diversity.
Just in the ones I mentioned, you have blacks, whites, white trash, Jews, and Mexicans.
Yes, Abbe Lane was Jewish, not Latin.
Lola Falana was perhaps best known for being Sammy Davis Jr.'s "protege"
Lola was also pretty much responsible for breaking up Sammy's marriage to Mai Britt, according to some sources.
She is not to be confused with Altovese Gore, who was Sammy's next and last wife, who ended up indigent and dead at 65.
Probably shook it up at one point or another.
Lola was also well known for battling major health problems.
I think she had more than one bout with multiple sclerosis.
It's been a rocky road for her.
But that didn't stop her from also playing Branson, in the late 90s.
Mai Britt is alive, and healthy, and remarried, and great, and pushing eighty.
She never had to shake it up.
So what have we learned from all of this?
That "Shakin' it up" is a precarious profession at best.
And if you can graduate from it, you are better off.
There don't seem to be any up-and-coming "Shakin'-it-uppers"
It seems to have become a lost art.
And if you have participated in it, there is an excellent chance that you were
either married to Xavier Cugat, or worked Branson.
Or both.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Shakin' It Up. 2.
More women who shook it up for a living:
Sheree North:
She made one of her earliest appearances on film shakin' it up in the Martin
and Lewis movie "Living It Up"
In "Living It Up", she did virtually nothing BUT shake it up.
Then, she signed on at Fox to essentially be Marilyn MONroe's caddy.
When that didn't pan out, they brought in Jayne Mansfield in that role.
Sheree never shook it up again to my knowledge after "Living It Up", and she then
appeared sporadically on TV and in minor movies.
She died about eight years ago.
Nothing really good came out of "Shakin it up" for Sheree.
Tina Turner:
She was actually one of the few who survived "Shakin' it up".
I think that it was Ike who imposed it on her.
And she shook it up great.
Once she was free of him, "Shakin' it up" went on the back burner.
Her great singing came to the fore.
Good for her.
Joey Heatherton:
This is certainly one of the sadder cases.
She was all about "Shakin' it up"
She never had any kind of a singing voice.
She was the daughter of Ray Heatherton, who played quite wholesome "Merry Mailman"
on early TV.
I'm sure he was quite proud.
Particularly when she had her major drug problems, and was married to Pro Football
star Lance Rentzel, who was arrested for exposing himself to little girls.
Not a peep out of Joey when that happened.
I sort of kind of expected her to do what Judy Garland did at the end of "A Star Is
Born", and step out in public and say "This is Mrs. Lance Rentzel".
This didn't happen.
She faded into oblivion.
Most likely along with her looks.
It has primarily been a bumpy road for the profession.
I'll conclude next time with the final examples of career "Shakin' it up" women.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Sheree North:
She made one of her earliest appearances on film shakin' it up in the Martin
and Lewis movie "Living It Up"
In "Living It Up", she did virtually nothing BUT shake it up.
Then, she signed on at Fox to essentially be Marilyn MONroe's caddy.
When that didn't pan out, they brought in Jayne Mansfield in that role.
Sheree never shook it up again to my knowledge after "Living It Up", and she then
appeared sporadically on TV and in minor movies.
She died about eight years ago.
Nothing really good came out of "Shakin it up" for Sheree.
Tina Turner:
She was actually one of the few who survived "Shakin' it up".
I think that it was Ike who imposed it on her.
And she shook it up great.
Once she was free of him, "Shakin' it up" went on the back burner.
Her great singing came to the fore.
Good for her.
Joey Heatherton:
This is certainly one of the sadder cases.
She was all about "Shakin' it up"
She never had any kind of a singing voice.
She was the daughter of Ray Heatherton, who played quite wholesome "Merry Mailman"
on early TV.
I'm sure he was quite proud.
Particularly when she had her major drug problems, and was married to Pro Football
star Lance Rentzel, who was arrested for exposing himself to little girls.
Not a peep out of Joey when that happened.
I sort of kind of expected her to do what Judy Garland did at the end of "A Star Is
Born", and step out in public and say "This is Mrs. Lance Rentzel".
This didn't happen.
She faded into oblivion.
Most likely along with her looks.
It has primarily been a bumpy road for the profession.
I'll conclude next time with the final examples of career "Shakin' it up" women.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Shakin' It Up.
Every day, I go to a website called Google Alt. Obituaries.
It's just about the best way to determine who has recently died.
There is a regular poster on this site who has this regular entry, "People who are
about to turn 80 or 90 this week"
He is referring to well-known people.
Whenever one of these posts appear, I usually find it startling.
It usually elicits the reaction "Is he (or she) really that old?"
Or "Is that person still alive?"
It is usually a head smacking moment.
And it usually makes you think about people you haven't thought about in quite a while.
One crept up on me this week: Abbe Lane.
She's turning 80 this week.
Abbe Lane.
80.
Now, there are some people that you just can't fathom turning 80.
One such is Abbe Lane.
She has certainly slipped off of my radar.
For those of you who don't remember, she was a very popular singer in the fifties and
early sixties.
She was also primarily known for two things: Being married to, and performing with,
Xavier Cugat, and pretty much being in on the ground floor of a form of major league
show business known as "Shakin' it up".
A form of singing and wriggling simultaneously.
And now, she is 80.
I hope she has adjusted well to this fact.
I'm pretty sure that the hips won't let her do much "Shakin' it up" these days.
When I was in college, it amused me and my friends to refer to her as "Abernathy Lane".
It still does.
I have had nightmares attempting to conjure up what she might look like currently.
Has she had work done?
Has she had major work done?
Has she grown old gracefully?
Has she had hip replacement?
There have been a handful of women who have, in one way or another, followed in her
footsteps.
And for the most part, their lives have checkered, at best.
Particularly when they have not been able to leave "Shakin' it up" behind.
One of them actually won a Kennedy Center Honor.
Who knows?
It might have actually been for being able to leave "Shakin' it up" behind.
I suppose a case can be made that a forerunner of Abbe Lane's was Josephine Baker.
But apparently, she was first and foremost an artist and a humanitarian.
However, she certainly did her share of "Shakin' it up", and if film footage is any indication, she did it naked, wearing nothing but bananas.
Yet I don't think the case for Josephine Baker is a particularly good one.
Next time, I will continue talking about women who pretty much hung their hats on
"Shakin' it up".
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
It's just about the best way to determine who has recently died.
There is a regular poster on this site who has this regular entry, "People who are
about to turn 80 or 90 this week"
He is referring to well-known people.
Whenever one of these posts appear, I usually find it startling.
It usually elicits the reaction "Is he (or she) really that old?"
Or "Is that person still alive?"
It is usually a head smacking moment.
And it usually makes you think about people you haven't thought about in quite a while.
One crept up on me this week: Abbe Lane.
She's turning 80 this week.
Abbe Lane.
80.
Now, there are some people that you just can't fathom turning 80.
One such is Abbe Lane.
She has certainly slipped off of my radar.
For those of you who don't remember, she was a very popular singer in the fifties and
early sixties.
She was also primarily known for two things: Being married to, and performing with,
Xavier Cugat, and pretty much being in on the ground floor of a form of major league
show business known as "Shakin' it up".
A form of singing and wriggling simultaneously.
And now, she is 80.
I hope she has adjusted well to this fact.
I'm pretty sure that the hips won't let her do much "Shakin' it up" these days.
When I was in college, it amused me and my friends to refer to her as "Abernathy Lane".
It still does.
I have had nightmares attempting to conjure up what she might look like currently.
Has she had work done?
Has she had major work done?
Has she grown old gracefully?
Has she had hip replacement?
There have been a handful of women who have, in one way or another, followed in her
footsteps.
And for the most part, their lives have checkered, at best.
Particularly when they have not been able to leave "Shakin' it up" behind.
One of them actually won a Kennedy Center Honor.
Who knows?
It might have actually been for being able to leave "Shakin' it up" behind.
I suppose a case can be made that a forerunner of Abbe Lane's was Josephine Baker.
But apparently, she was first and foremost an artist and a humanitarian.
However, she certainly did her share of "Shakin' it up", and if film footage is any indication, she did it naked, wearing nothing but bananas.
Yet I don't think the case for Josephine Baker is a particularly good one.
Next time, I will continue talking about women who pretty much hung their hats on
"Shakin' it up".
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Saturday, December 1, 2012
Report Card---"The Impossible"
Once again, I'm going to take a completely different approach than the typical Report Card.
Be forewarned.
I'm going to reveal the entire plot of this movie.
I'm doing this because if you, as a moviegoer, can't figure out the entire plot in the first five minutes, you should return to the box office, and offer to turn in your eyeballs.
It's about the Tsunami of 2004.
It tells you that this is what it's about.
It's a true story, about a family trapped in the Tsunami.
They tell you this.
So what in the wide world could be the plot of this movie?
Could it perhaps be that the Tsunami separates members of this family, and that at least one of them becomes seriously ill because of it?
And that they eventually find each other?
While hundreds of thousands of other folks are dead around them, and we're not at all
supposed to care about them(A la Schindler's List) ?
And then the sick one recovers and they go home?
It could be and is perhaps all of that.
Could it perhaps have been anything else?
You tell me.
It wasn't.
And what brought them all back together was nothing but blind luck.
It wasn't even inspirational.
It was an Irwin Allen disaster flick, just barely given the imprimatur of reality.
On to the scoring:
Is it interesting?
Only the footage of the Tsunami is interesting.
The rest of it is a snoozefest.
D-.
Compelling even?
Please.
F.
Is it controversial?
What's controversial is that, according to Rotten Tomatoes, the movie reviewing
website, it received an 89% positive result.
This is astounding to me. I can't stop talking about it.
B+.
Is it a story worth telling?
Not at all. just because it's true, and sort of ennobling doesn't make it worth telling.
F.
Is it good storytelling?
It is merely perfunctory.
C-.
Is it well written?
The writing is also merely perfunctory.
C-.
Is it well cast? Well played?, Well shot?
Perfunctory, perfunctory, and perfunctory.
C-, C-, C-.
Is it too long? Too short?
Way too long.
F.
Is it believable? Do you care about the characters?
It's believable because it's true. I don't give a shit about the characters.
At least in the Irwin Allen disaster flicks, they usually spent at least 45 minutes
trying to get you interested in the characters before the disaster happens. It was done on a very superficial level, but an attempt was made.
Here, the Tsunami happens in the first fifteen minutes. You don't even get to know the characters. So you have no reason to care about them.
F.
Is it predictable? Does it surprise you?
Totally predictable. At least in an Irwin Allen flick, there was a good chance that someone would die. It was fiction, so they could do whatever they wanted.
Not here. If they were going to die, then why make the movie? Hell, why make the movie anyway?
And of course, there were no surprises.
F.
Do you think about it after you've seen it?
Only when I reflect on what a waste of two hours it was, and how critics are falling all over themselves over this one.
F.
Is it funny?
It makes a couple of minor stabs at it, and they are okay, I guess.
B.
Would it have been worth the thirteen bucks it would have cost to see it in the movies?
I would have paid thirteen bucks to not see it.
F.
Is it impressive ?
Not on any level.
F.
Overall grade: F.
This was an exploitation film.
If this movie actually gets nominated for anything, and Heaven forbid, actually
wins, I can just picture the producer thanking the family for their bravery and tenacity.
Meanwhile, he's thinking to himself, "Thank God there was a Tsunami, or I would have never won nothin'.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Be forewarned.
I'm going to reveal the entire plot of this movie.
I'm doing this because if you, as a moviegoer, can't figure out the entire plot in the first five minutes, you should return to the box office, and offer to turn in your eyeballs.
It's about the Tsunami of 2004.
It tells you that this is what it's about.
It's a true story, about a family trapped in the Tsunami.
They tell you this.
So what in the wide world could be the plot of this movie?
Could it perhaps be that the Tsunami separates members of this family, and that at least one of them becomes seriously ill because of it?
And that they eventually find each other?
While hundreds of thousands of other folks are dead around them, and we're not at all
supposed to care about them(A la Schindler's List) ?
And then the sick one recovers and they go home?
It could be and is perhaps all of that.
Could it perhaps have been anything else?
You tell me.
It wasn't.
And what brought them all back together was nothing but blind luck.
It wasn't even inspirational.
It was an Irwin Allen disaster flick, just barely given the imprimatur of reality.
On to the scoring:
Is it interesting?
Only the footage of the Tsunami is interesting.
The rest of it is a snoozefest.
D-.
Compelling even?
Please.
F.
Is it controversial?
What's controversial is that, according to Rotten Tomatoes, the movie reviewing
website, it received an 89% positive result.
This is astounding to me. I can't stop talking about it.
B+.
Is it a story worth telling?
Not at all. just because it's true, and sort of ennobling doesn't make it worth telling.
F.
Is it good storytelling?
It is merely perfunctory.
C-.
Is it well written?
The writing is also merely perfunctory.
C-.
Is it well cast? Well played?, Well shot?
Perfunctory, perfunctory, and perfunctory.
C-, C-, C-.
Is it too long? Too short?
Way too long.
F.
Is it believable? Do you care about the characters?
It's believable because it's true. I don't give a shit about the characters.
At least in the Irwin Allen disaster flicks, they usually spent at least 45 minutes
trying to get you interested in the characters before the disaster happens. It was done on a very superficial level, but an attempt was made.
Here, the Tsunami happens in the first fifteen minutes. You don't even get to know the characters. So you have no reason to care about them.
F.
Is it predictable? Does it surprise you?
Totally predictable. At least in an Irwin Allen flick, there was a good chance that someone would die. It was fiction, so they could do whatever they wanted.
Not here. If they were going to die, then why make the movie? Hell, why make the movie anyway?
And of course, there were no surprises.
F.
Do you think about it after you've seen it?
Only when I reflect on what a waste of two hours it was, and how critics are falling all over themselves over this one.
F.
Is it funny?
It makes a couple of minor stabs at it, and they are okay, I guess.
B.
Would it have been worth the thirteen bucks it would have cost to see it in the movies?
I would have paid thirteen bucks to not see it.
F.
Is it impressive ?
Not on any level.
F.
Overall grade: F.
This was an exploitation film.
If this movie actually gets nominated for anything, and Heaven forbid, actually
wins, I can just picture the producer thanking the family for their bravery and tenacity.
Meanwhile, he's thinking to himself, "Thank God there was a Tsunami, or I would have never won nothin'.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Subscribe To
Posts
All Comments