The 100 Funniest Words. Part Three.

The following suggestions were made in the Comments section:

"To update the list, we could scratch off broccoli, dropkick, breadbox, salami and chickenfat."

I have no problem scratching broccoli, breadbox, or salami.

But I draw the line at chickenfat and dropkick.

The great comedy writer Pat McCormick, when asked "What do you want to do tonight?", replied "Let's dropkick shit"

I insist that his memory be honored.

As for the other suggestions, I will deal with them individually and subjectively:

shiitake--Too oblique. Why not just say "shit"?
cockatoo(or cockatiel)---We already have "cuckoo, which is funnier than either.
lalapalooza---not as funny as "labonza", which I will add.
palooka,---never thought it was funny.
titmouse--I think it deserves honorable mention.,
slinky (the toy)---I can't think of a context where it would be usable.
boo-boo--perhaps if it was pronounced "buuh-boo"
tipsy--no thanks.
frankfurter---the only sausage I would consider is "bratwurst", and I'm still not sure about even that.
smegma--more disgusting than anything else.
stroganoff--not for me.
Sheboygan,---an obvious choice that I overlooked.
taint---no
Bangkok---no
chowder---no
pluot---I plead ignorance.,
cock-eyed,----the image is funnier than the word.
knockwurst----asked and answered,
tchotchke---There's definitely a place for "tchotchke"
pumpernickel,---Already on the list
sarcophagus---'Tis only an ugly word.
cadaver---same as sarcophagus.
Lake Titicaca---The rules say it must be only one word.
whirlygig---not for me.
tubesteak,---I don't see it.
spleen---There is a good case to be made for it.
crotchety-----I don't think so.
vacillate---I'm not even vacillating. No.
masticate---I considered that one, but it didn't make the cut.
tinsel---don't see the point.
fracus---you'd think so, but no.
organ grinder---Two words
scruples----doesn't try hard enough
yogurt---a poor substitute for sour cream, which we can't use.
edamame---don't see it.
flatulence---definitely. I'll add it. .
Arugula---too close to "kugel" We can't have both.
sphincter----too unfamiliar, too many meanings.
zygote----In the anti-abortion era, it's lost any potential humor.
gherkin---I like it.
canker sore----The two-word rule, among other things.
Altoid---not today.
scrotum---you'd think it is, but it isn't.
putz---of course.
dipstick----I prefer Lipschitz.
douche--too easy.
schmendrick I was toying with it. I'll add it.
I will also add phallus, and one more that I'm embarrassed to have neglected:
cooties.

Next time, the completely updated list.
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