On a recent trip to my attic, I stumbled upon a relic from the 1970's.
Early on in my TV writing career, we all determined that it would be invaluable to have a particular writing tool at our disposal:
A list of the hundred funniest words.
A kind of go-to list when writing comedy, particularly for finding the right word to end a sentence of dialogue, to form a punchline.
The list we compiled was often revised, to accommodate better and funnier words, thus allowing us to separate the wheat from the chaff, as it were.
I can't recall where this particular list fell in the sequence of revisions.
It's simply the one I stumbled upon in my attic.
The rules then were that they had to be one word.
Not two words strung together.
Proper names were deemed acceptable.
You'll find a preponderance of Yiddish words, and words loaded with "K" sounds.
Neil Simon taught us well.
I see no reason not to continue the tradition of updating the list, so if you have suggestions for possible replacements, the Comments section is the place to offer them.
They must be timeless, so "Kardashian" is unacceptable.
So, here goes, from 1977:
1- blintz
2- knish
3- bumbershoot
4- cucumber
5- broccoli
6- crumbcake
7- gorgonzola
8- glockenspiel
9- spittoon
10- rutabaga
11- bagel
12- dropkick
13- pretzel
14- prunes
15- shellaleigh
16- gavotte
17- snotnose
18- bellybutton
19- asscrack
20- cahoots
21- snootful
22- pants
23- zipper
24- matzoh
25- halvah
26- bocci
27- belch
28- phlegm
29- phlange
30- macaroni
31- scungilli
32- upchuck
33- fish
34- pistachio
35- clodhopper
36- Kalamazoo
37- provolone
38- kugel
39- latkes
40- brouhaha
41- cuckoo
42- breadbox
43- lox
44- pus
45- ukulele
46- sauerkraut
47- boogers
48- spatula
49- petunia
50- blubber
51- mudpack
52- peepers
53- bedbugs
54- dumbbell
55- tsitzis
56- dildo
57- cumquat
58- macaroon
59- festoon
60-Cucamonga
61- guacamole
62- poppycock
63- tommyrot
64- kerfuffle
65- pumpernickel
66- Riboflavin
67- pickle
68- knockers
69- muskrat
70- wienershnitzel
71- salami
72- fleugelhorn
73- gallstones
74- hippopotamus
75- giraffe
76- cockroach
77- klutz
78- schlemiel
79- hangnail
80- armpit
81- tonsillectomy
82- slush
83- blunderbuss
84- farts
85- bloomers (underwear, not flowers)
86- bric-a-brac
87- boner
88- coccyx
89- chickenfat
90- Poughkeepsie
91- blimp
92- pimples
93- aardvark
94- cubbyhole
95- yucch
96- seltzer
97- igloo
98- Edsel
99- noodles
100- cottonpickin'
*************
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My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel, "Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperbacks, "Mark Rothman's Essays", and my new novel, "I'm Not Garbo" are available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.
******
Thursday, July 18, 2013
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- When You're Smilin'.......
- Life And Fun.
- The Hundred Funniest Words. Part Four
- The 100 Funniest Words. Part Three.
- The Hundred Funniest Words. Part Two.
- The 100 Funniest Words.
- Richard Erdman On The OTN. Part Two.
- Richard Erdman On The OTN.
- Things Not To Do In Mississippi.
- Lord Of The Idiots.
- Shrinks On The OTN.
- ....And No More Ribbons, Either.
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About Me
- mark rothman
- Hi. I am, according to my Wikipedia entry,(which I did not create) a noted television writer, playwright, screenwriter, and occasional actor. You can Google me or go to the IMDB to get my credits, and you can come here to get my opinions on things, which I'll try to express eloquently. Hopefully I'll succeed. You can also e-mail me at macchus999@aol.com. Perhaps my biggest claim to fame is being responsible, for about six months in 1975, while Head Writer for the "Happy Days" TV series, for Americans saying to each other "Sit on it."
perhaps one of these? cockatoo (or cockatiel), lalapalooza, palooka, titmouse, slinky (the toy), plop, boo-boo, tipsy, or frankfurter?
ReplyDeleteTo update the list, we could scratch off broccoli, dropkick, breadbox, salami and chickenfat, and add on the following - shiitake, smegma, stroganoff, Sheboygan, taint, Bangkok, chowder, pluot, cock-eyed, knockwurst, tchochke, pumpernickel, sarcophagus, cadaver, Lake Titicaca, whirlygig, tubesteak, spleen, crotchety, vacillate, masticate, tinsel, fracus, organ grinder, scruples, yogurt, edamame and flatulence. MORE TO COME.
ReplyDeleteArugula, sphincter, zygote, canker sore, Altoid, scrotum, gherkin.
ReplyDeleteputz, dipstick, douche, schmendrick
ReplyDeleteTom
I have two things to say:
ReplyDelete1-as far as i am concerned broccoli was a one season wonder and should be removed from the list. after the hoo-haw about the remark by president bush (the first) it lost a lot of ground in the funny department
2-a lot of these words are funny because of the way they sound, but a many of them are funny because (how can i put this DELLLL-i-cat-ly), they evoke funny images, or at least images that inspire one to smile. I put pickle and cucumber in this category, among others.