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Thursday, February 7, 2013

Reporte Carte---"Amour"

"Amour" is this French picture that was nominated for Best Picture, as was it's leading lady, Emmanuelle Riva.
It has English subtitles, which meant I had to read along with it.
It begins with the police, or fire department finding Riva dead in her bed.
Now, you know the rest of the movie will be in flashback, because you don't nominate an actress for just lying in bed, dead.
And the rest of the movie is her husband trying to take care of this dying woman, not wanting to let go of her.
It is agonizingly slow and dee-pressing.
Appropriately, the Report Card scoring will be conducted by the late, great French filmmaker,
Francois Truffaut, in French.
I will provide English translation in parentheses.
You'll have to forgive M. Truffaut if his French isn't perfect.
After all, he has been dead for years.

On to the scoring:

Is it interesting?

Un petit peux. (A little bit.)
B+.

Compelling even?

Non. (No)
C-.

Is it controversial?

Un petit peux. Le determination pour euthanasie est toujours interessante.
(A little, Having to decide about performing euthanasia is always interesting.)
B-.

Is it a story worth telling?

Peut-etre. (Perhaps.)
B.

Is it good storytelling?

Non. Il ny'a pas un fin. (No. There is really no satisfying ending.)
D.

Is it well written?

Non. C'est simplistique et du minime. (No, it's simplistic and minimal.)
D-.

Is it well cast? Well played?, Well shot?

Les performances, c'est tres bien. Le camera "dwells" beaucoup, a la Cassavetes.
(The actors were very good. The shots linger way too long, like a Cassavetes movie.)
B-.

Is it too long? Too short?

Tres, tres extensive. (Very, very long.)
F.

Is it believable? Do you care about the characters?

Oui, et oui. (Yes, and yes.)
A.

Is it predictable? Does it surprise you?

Oui. Elle est morte. Nous savons la. (Yes. She's dead. We know that from the beginning.)
C'est un surpris parce que nous n'avons pas l'idee de la methode.
(It's surprising because we don't know how she dies.)
B.

Do you think about it after you've seen it?

Non. (No.)
C-.

Is it funny?

Non. (No.)
C-.

Would it have been worth the thirteen bucks it would have cost to see it in the movies?

Pas de francs. (Not any money.)
F.

Is it impressive ?

Je ne pense pas. (I don't think so.)
C-.

Overall grade: C-.

Sacre bleu! (I really rather disliked this movie.)

Thank you, Francois. I'll try not to bother you again.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My books ,"Show Runner" and it's sequel,"Show Runner Two", can be found at the Amazon Kindle Store.
Along with the newer ones, "The Man Is Dead", and "Report Cards".
You can search by typing in my name, Cindy Williams, Laverne & Shirley, The Odd Couple, or Happy Days.
Check them out.
You don't need a Kindle machine to download them.
Just get the free app from Kindle, and they can be downloaded to an IPhone, IPad, or Blackberry.
The paperback, "Mark Rothman's Essays" is still available for people without Kindle.
I have many readings and signings remaining, and the thing about Kindle is you can't sign one.
If you'd like one, contact me at macchus999@aol.com.
And now, we've got my reading of my "Laverne & Shirley Movie" screenplay on YouTube.

******

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About Me

Hi. I am, according to my Wikipedia entry,(which I did not create) a noted television writer, playwright, screenwriter, and occasional actor. You can Google me or go to the IMDB to get my credits, and you can come here to get my opinions on things, which I'll try to express eloquently. Hopefully I'll succeed. You can also e-mail me at macchus999@aol.com. Perhaps my biggest claim to fame is being responsible, for about six months in 1975, while Head Writer for the "Happy Days" TV series, for Americans saying to each other "Sit on it."